The Weary Weekend Warrior

My husband used to play sports.

He used to love an intense game of racquetball. He was outdoorsy, too. He loved to go hiking, rock-climbing and camping. We have an impressive collection of hiking and rock-climbing gear in our basement, in fact. He was the adventurous type.

Today, he’s just as adventurous. His weekend activities are just as intense as they ever were. Of course, his backdrop is decidedly different and his destination has done a 180: now, his weekend travels take him no farther than our own backyard. Forget rock-climbing in the Appalachians and hiking in the Catskills: today Zach’s wild, uncharted territory lies within the crumbling, crooked walls of our new (old) house. He has become The Weekend Warrior.

I can’t tell you how many people have said to me over the past year, with a knowing smirk and friendly chuckle to accompany it, “Welcome to home ownership. There are ALWAYS projects to do around the house.” If I had a dollar for every time I heard that we might actually have enough money to renovate our kitchen. (Ok, maybe not. Maybe a thousand dollars every time I heard it. Kitchens are expensive!!)

And, of course, I understand that’s true. However, I must make one addendum to that statement: never is this more true than in the first year of owning a home. And not just THAT, but in a home that is 50 years old, hasn’t been updated in 30, and that sat vacant for 6 months prior to our move-in date.

And without much family in the area, and those who are being annoyingly busy with jobs and lives of their own, Zach has quietly assumed the role of Tim the Tool Man around the house. Armed with more tools than I’m convinced anyone ever really needs, several home how-to books and endless trips to Home Depot, he has become our resident expert and workhorse in all matters of home improvement. Although where you might hear Tim’s happy grunts as he embarks on a new project, you can probably substitute some not-so-happy “(*@##%#@” on Zach’s part.

When Zach goes to Home Depot, I know to keep the phone close by as I can typically expect no less than two calls per trip. “They don’t have this. Do you want me to just pick something else out instead?” To which my reply is typically “Yes,” because any parent knows that trying to go to a home improvement store with two kids in tow to choose… well, anything, is virtually impossible. Easier to just buy it now and return it later.

So now, where weekends used to be playing with the kids, doing an occasional fix-it around the house or perhaps making a shopping trip together, they are different now. It is just assumed that Zach’s weekend will be spent tackling a laundry list of projects… some new, some ongoing. He has learned a lot in this process. He’s learned a lot about woodworking, installing light fixtures and ceiling fans, putting in new closet and interior doors, installing door knobs, even putting up new walls and chopping down trees. He has learned, unfortunately a little too late after pulling out the old toilet, where the main water shutoff is. At the end of each weekend day he is usually covered in some kind of dust, plaster, wood chips, or an assortment of other substances. He eats on the go, showers at night, and tries to keep his patience as an over-eager 3-year old is constantly trying to “help.” He is a self-taught perfectionist.

One of these days, I hope, the projects will slow down enough so that maybe, just maybe, he can spend one afternoon relaxing on the front porch watching Alexander play outside, sipping a glass of iced tea and admiring his handiwork.

But then he’ll probably spot those weeds that need to be pulled up.